Father Maverick [transcription]

[O excerto do Religulous que tinha trazido para aqui foi removido do Google Video por alegada violação de copyright, e o post sem vídeo tornou-se bastante inútil. Fica então aqui a transcrição do segmento com o padre católico Reginald Foster no Vaticano, alguém bastante longe da ortodoxia tradicionalista a que se associa o catolicismo. A transcrição deve ter algumas falhas.]

Father Reginald Foster – Senior Vatican Priest

Bill Maher – When you look at a building like that… a giant..palace!.. does it seem at odds with the message of the founder?

Reginald Foster – Well, certainly.

BM – [laughter]

RF – I mean, that’s obvious!

BM -It really is obvious, isn’t it? I mean, but does it bother you?

RF – I mean… well, yes it does… If I were the boss I wouldn’t live in there. I mean Jesus would probably be out in some barracks here.. in a suburb of Rome, got it?

BM -You never get so fed up you want to take the collar off and go..

RF – ..Well I don’t wear a collar..

BM – ..”That’s it captain, take my badge and my collar!”

No… I read about ten books recently about the rationality of religion, and everyone is saying it’s stupid…

BM – You know what’s gonna happen to them?..

RF – [laughetr] No, what’s gonna happen?

BM – They’ll be roasting in Hell!

RF – Come on!.. Roasting in… that’s the old catholic thing..

BM – That’s what they taught me..

RF – I know we had Hell business…

BM – Oh, come on… the standard doctrine that I was taught..

RF – Yeah, I mean, that’s all gone, that’s all finished..

BM – [laughter] ..but that’s not fair!..

RF – [nhaaa plrfff!]

BM – The date of Jesus’ birth really wasn’t estabilished until 349 AD..

RF – Oh yeah, yeah. He might have been born on July 3rd! These are all nice stories, you know…

BM – And that doesn’t bother you, either?

RF – Well that bothers me too! Whenever there’s a “Ooh, we have to have midnight mass because Jesus was born on midnight of the 25th of… this is all nonsense!

BM – You’re a maverick aren’t you?

RF – I’m not a maverick!

BM – You’re ‘father maverick’, you do things your own way!..

(…)

BM – When you add up all the saints, and all the angels, and archangels, and super-duper angels, and there’s God-the-Father, God-the-Son, the Holy Ghost, Mother Mary, it does start to look like it’s not quite the monotheistic religion that it’s advocated…

RF – Oh, I understand… it’s like we have mini-gods.

BM – Yeah, well it does seem like that..I mean people pray to a..

RF – Some people don’t understand this. You probably… ah, you don’t follow things… but we had a survey here in Italy, and they said “in a crisis, to what kind of saints do you pray to?”, got it? Do you know who’s the 6th on the list? Jesus Christ!

BM – The 6th?!

RF – He is the 6th man that the italians call upon when they have problems, isn’t that neat?.. Talk about cafeteria catholics..

BM – So how do you convince people of what’s the truth?

RF – You don’t, forget it. They just have to live and die with their stupid ideas.

BM -  [laughter]

RF – I’m sorry.. what are you gonna do?..